On the Allies of Change: Anger & Fear

Dear quarter lives,

It is not uncommon to doubt. It is not unusual to question even the most beloved of people, the most beloved of ideas, the most beloved of things. It is unusual though to doubt forever, to question forever. To remain the same in any way, that is most unusual. A statue, we call one who never changes. Even the dead change. They rot and lose their flesh leaving behind only bone, and later, only fossil. It is not a matter of choice either. It is a matter of change. A constant binding us all to one another,  a chemical reaction where a change on one end of the equation influences the other end. It is our choice though to resist change. But it is unnatural to resist change for long. It is unnatural to resist change to the point of turning into statue. What must be acceptable is the fear surrounding change. The anger too. They are not emotions that simply signal danger; they have many purposes. Have you not wondered why fear and anger coincide with specific types of change? All emotions induce a reaction of some sort, and thereby a change. Not all changes are created equal, but all changes are intended to transform. It is time to see fear as an aid, anger an ally, that help prepare you for change. They alter your chemistry. They change how you perceive your environment and how you feel about it, because it is difficult to let go of that which you deeply and profoundly love. It is hard to let go of our parents when they die, even if they have caused us pain, why? Because of the deep boundless love we have for them. The only way to endure that change is to be angry. It is for your survival. Anger is here to help cushion the blow. It is here to carry you through it, through the pain, the sorrow, even the doubt towards God. It is your friend. Ask it why it is here for you? Why it has come now? Why it is making noise today louder than yesterday? What is it trying to tell you? What change has it been protecting you from? What has it been cushioning? Which blow? From who? And why? Which loss has anger been helping you cope with?

And it is only when we sit with anger for some time and listen to what it has to say, will it tell us why it has come and on what conditions it will leave. For anger, like fear, will not leave until it is sure we can protect ourselves, that we are strong enough to handle whatever comes our way. Anger and fear are here to help us build muscle, so do not run away from them, approach them, surrender to them, for they are here to train you to become the strongest version of yourself. It is why they are here. So accept them as your teachers, and become their humble student, until you graduate their school of life. It is the only way to get rid of them. They came for you out of love, so return them too to the Universe with love. So dear quarter lives, be grateful to your anger, say thank you to your fear, and when you are ready, you will be the one to say good bye to them. 

With love always,

S.A.